Tuesday, March 31, 2009


Sorry for the lack of posts lately, schoolwork is currently bogging me down and i dont even want to talk about friday night's embarassment, other than i could sum it up all in one photo.

Ah yes the infamous crying child. we'll see you again in 5 months, unless we find out that mike williams tears his ACL(knock on wood).
And on a sad note, i regretfully must say that Kristof Ongenaet is no longer part of the SU hoops team. Those belgians grow up so fast................ the breakfast bunch will never be the same.

Friday, March 20, 2009

NCAA First Round Preview

Folks, Our Day has come. Today we will tip off at 12:15 beat the ass of a team who hasnt even been to the tournament, and lock up our first NCAA tournament victory in 1,825 days. We haven't won an ncaa tournament game as long as ive been in high school, heres hoping i dont have to partake in the walk of shame for the 5th consecutive year.

Here's today's starting lineups:

Stephen F. Austin
PG:Eric Bell

Tiny, quick guard who can get dribble penetration in the blink of an eye, but he's never seen a player like Flynn before.

SG:Eddie Williams

Loves to take the ball to the basket frequently, very similar to devendorf in that aspect.

SF:Josh Alexander

Small(and by that i mean im taller than him), but athletic forward who can step back and take the deep jumper. Harris needs to be in his face at all times to limit his effectiveness.

PF: Nick Shaw

Veteran forward with a playing style similar to that of our very own KRISTOF!. Gets plenty of boards, but he's practically worthless on the offensive end.

C:Matt Kingsley

Solid post presence who has something onuaku doesnt have: a jumper.


Syracuse Key to the game: Start fast. I dont know how to put it, many other 2 and 3 seeds have already nearly been bounced because they allowed other teams to keep pace. Let flynn control the tempo and just score as quickly as possible.

Xs And Os:Austin runs a basic Zone offense with either the power forward or center flashing to the high post. Then dumping it off for a backdoor layup or popping it out for the open 3.

Thursday, March 19, 2009

Stephen F. Who?

"Stephen Fuller Austin (November 3, 1793 – December 27, 1836), known as the "Father of Texas", led the second and ultimately successful colonization of the region by settlers from the United States. The capital of Texas, Austin in Travis County, Austin County, Stephen F. Austin State University in Nacogdoches, Austin College in Sherman, as well as a number of K-12 schools are named in his honor"

That just makes this school sound increasingly worthless. In case you have had your head buried in the sand along the potomac river, we are playing a University named after this guy in a first rounder tomorrow in miami. So much for intimidating, i dont know where the lumberjack nickname possibly could have came from, and this perplexes me for the following two reasons:

A.Stephen Austin was NOT a lumberjack.

B.I dont even think that there are TREES in texas

Therefore, why could they possibly be called the lumberjacks?

"Since the university first opened its doors in 1923, SFA's athletic teams and students in general have been known as the Lumberjacks. The nickname was chosen in an assembly held shortly after the institution officially opened classes. Students and faculty met to debate the merits of several potential nicknames, with the proponents of each choice leading cheers to rally support for their proposed mascots. T.E. Ferguson -- a professor of English at the time, whose name now adorns an academic building on campus -- submitted "Lumberjacks," a nickname he found appropriate for a university surrounded by the piney woods of Deep East Texas. The assembly agreed. With the arrival of the first women's basketball team in the late 1930s, SFA's female athletes took on the moniker of Ladyjacks, a nickname chosen by two of the campus's pioneers in women's athletics -- Drs. Lucille Norton and June Irwin."

Oh, Snap, i swear i had no clue there were trees in texas..... they always portray it as some sort of deserted wasteland, like in friday night lights.

But a new question now emerges: Can these kids play?

Yes and no. They really don't have a consistent scoring threat, and their forward play is less than stellar. Ongenenaet should have his way with these guys and force them to take bad shots. Oh, Did we mention they have a 5'3 Point Guard who "Likes Being small?"


take it for what its worth folks, i gotta get to class.

Sunday, March 15, 2009

And Now, we wait..........

With the Tournament Bracket being unveiled in less than 2 hours time, here's a final look at our resume:

In a few hours we'll know where the Orange stand in the NCAA Tournament. Let's take one final look at the resume the committee will be dissecting to decide what SU is ranked, where they play and who they'll be playing.

Record: 26-9

Big East Record (Including BET): 14-8

OOC Record: 12-1

RPI: 12th (out of 343)

Key OOC Wins: Memphis, Kansas, Florida

Key OOC Losses: Cleveland State

Key BET Wins: UConn (BET), Marquette

Key BET Losses: Pitt, UConn, Villanova (2), Louisville (2)

Record vs RPI Top Ten: 2-4

Record vs RPI Top Twenty-Five: 5-6

Last Ten Games: 8-2

NCAA Tourney Opponents: Cleveland St. (L), Cornell (W), Louisville (2 L),

Other opponents still waiting: Florida, Providence(L)

(Thanks for the whole thing sean)

Now the question gets posed: What have we really done that will make us look superior to many of the other teams we know are in?

1.We're undefeated in overtime games this year.
2.We're undefeated against Tournament-Bound West Virginia
3.We handed a highly overrated memphis team their last loss.
(Jesus christ, their conference REALLY sucks)
4.We have the greatest homoerotic poser on the face of the planet.
5.He's also got the strongest pimp hand in division 1.
6.We had only one more loss than the football team! and more games!
7.We beat Notre Dame convincingly and it wasnt considered a miracle.
8.the creation of several new basketball terms such as the SLAMWOW
9.The Breakfast Bunch.
10.The thought that theoretically we could be 2-0 against UConn this season.
10 and a half. I'll Stop.... Right.... There. You've seen enough.

What have we done wrong?
1.We lost more than 0 games.
2.Cleveland State *Cough cough*
3.Devo's high fiving antics nearly got him kicked off the team.
4.We're playing with 7 guys again
5. Getting swept by nova doesnt help.
6. We made a poor innocent man piss his pants.
7. We caused many other drunk BET Attendees to stumble down the stairs and require the assistance of more than 3 ushers in addition to the 2 poor fans he just fell on, and in the process he spilled their beers.
8.That Disconcerting road loss to georgetown(NIT Bubble team).
9.Devendorf inconvenienced several committee members on the highway.

Where will we be seeded: This depends on how much the tournament committee actually likes us now that they know if they seed us lower than a 4 they can never show their face in syracuse again. They'll wind up on the blacklist, just like tim higgins, Doug Gottleib, and every other bum that left syracuse out of their top 25. If i had to take a wild stab we'll wind up as a 3, a 2 if they like us, and a 4 if they really dare to make syracusians so upset that they will cry in to their T3I Orange Snuggies for days on end while they wait for us to drop our first rounder again.

Thats all i have to say for now, all we can really do is wait and hope for the best.
Knock on wood.

Tuesday, March 10, 2009

Queer Eye for the Syracuse Guy.

Over the past week it has come to my attention that many of the orange players and coaches we come to know and love(and sometimes loathe) are now obsessed with their wardrobes. Imagine if we took 5 of these gentlemen, forced them to pretend to be gay, and remade a largely unpopular but still on show on an obscure cable network called Bravo. I give you the fab 5.

Quentin Hillsman

Stylin with Coach Q

When this man's coaching career ends, dont be suprised if he comes out with his own clothing line simply called Q. Pretty much all the coaches will be wearing this stuff, just like our syracuse snuggies we're still desperately waiting for.

Paul Harris

Paul, stop attempting to pick up 10 year old boys at charity functions!
I don't care if this is your pimp suit or not, 10 year old boys do NOT qualify as big pimpin. Hell, this is not pimpin at all, you CAN do better.
Take a page from arinze's book................

Solid color, no stripes. Brown also hides dirt.

Speaking of stripes...........

Here's hoping we can ban stripes permanently from the SU locker room
Except when they're worn in good taste, like my main man Kristof!

Well done sir, well done.

Is this thing on?

This is a miracle in progress right here. Despite my school's incredibly stingy(and sometimes asinine) internet filtering, i have somehow managed to make it onto this site to do a little thing i like to call posting. I will be doing this rather frequently. Let's hope this can continue. *Knock on wood*

Monday, March 9, 2009

Tourney talk

Once again, sorry for the outrageous lack of updates folks. I've been busy the last couple of weeks running around doing the bidding of others. Are we good or am i going to have to pay you all off to quit whining?

Well, boys and girls, we've done it. We finally got the elusive road win we had been looking for as the Orange downed Marquette in overtime. What does this do for us?

  • Signature Conference Road win
  • We ACTUALLY didnt fold in the last 2 minutes.
  • 6th seed in the tournament

That seems like such a wonderful thing, until you are a ticket holder for that game. I now get to watch the orange blow out the winner of the Seton Hall-USF Game for 50 bucks a ticket. But that isint the best part...... The tickets got bumped up by 30 dollars right after i bought them.

(laughter and golf claps)

Stubhub is such a pathetic website for allowing that to take place.

Tuesday, March 3, 2009

Sunday, March 1, 2009


I woulda loved to do a preview but im hacking my brains out now.

Jim Calhoun.