Tuesday, December 30, 2008

here goes nothing....

well tonight it begins........

What do you mean what is "it"?

world peace? no!

american economic turnaround? nope.

the doug marrone era? not yet, we'll let you know in 9 months.

I'm actually talking about the start of big east play, and tonight's faceoff against seton hall should be a good indicator on where we're going to stand in the big east, mainly because we all know how well polls actually predict things...... pfft.

Things SU must do tonight to escape with the win:

Feed the rock to Rautins and Onuaku: can't stress it enough, Rautins was Red-Hot against coppin state and onuaku makes a ton of shots in the post, feed one, and then the other and you have yourself a gameplan.

Crack the 1-2-1-1: This press is very difficult to get past, especially with an athletic roster of guys, look for flynn to get trapped by the point and shooting guards early, and then he'll need to dish off to the other guard or the small forward on the floor. If they get over the midcourt line, their next step is to avoid the corners because the forwards are going to come up and trap on either side and attempt to force a steal or a backcourt violation. What the orange can do is attempt to draw up the Pirate defense and then toss a long one to everyone's favorite non-football player with football ability, paul harris.

Free Throws: Self-Explanatory.

Limit Devo's minutes: yes please, do it. i say jimmy B takes him out every time he makes a bad pass tonight or attempts to take it to the rack himself despite being faced with 3 defenders.

Start fast: playing from behind is going to come back to kill us sooner or later, especially in the big east. give the rock to flynn or onuaku and let them get things started.

Well boys and girls, i have some stuff to do before the game,

i'll be over chatting with the 3 idiots tonight. hope to see you there and i'll hopefully host a chat next game, which is at south florida on friday night.

I'll be back here later for some postgame thoughts and another shiny(or not) pair of boxer shorts.

Golden Underoos: game of the year

Ironically enough, today's award does not go to the orange basketball team or the lacrosse team, but to a team less likely to win more than half their games, much less an award.

And the game of the year award goes to...................

the Football upset vs. Notre Dame

And as a parting gift for mr. greggers, a complimentary golden thong.

Ok so why this game? well nothing makes for a great game like david hangin with goliath, and seeing that it gets no more "david" than us, and no more "goliath"(at least in the eyes of the misinformed public) than notre dame, it was a perfect chance to show that we could "fight the fight". and this win really snowballed into something that DID catch fire as we prevailed 24-23 because of the following field goal:

The ND fans also chose to "fight the fight" and interestingly enough, it was a "snowball" fight that did "catch fire":

hmm..... interesting.

i'll now post my pregame notes for seton hall.

Saturday, December 27, 2008

Golden Underoos:Fashion Statement of the year

Another day, and another award to hand out to a deserving individual. today's award is slightly special in the sense that it's the first not handed out to an SU athlete, but to a fan. and so today i give out the fashion statement of the year award.

And the underoo goes to...................

Jameson Fleming and his Duct Tape Suit!

The kid comes dressed to impress. I dig.

And now i wait for an acceptance speech... which i'll post here if appropriate.

Friday, December 26, 2008

Golden Underoos 2008 part 1

As 2008 draws to a close, it's been a year to remember and forget in Syracuse Athletics history. From the Lacrosse national championship that i forgot to watch because i was virtually passed out, to our lovely(?) football(?) team(?).

So with that, i figure i should hand out some end of year awards of my own choosing, a few serious ones, quite a few humorous ones. I shall call it, the GOLDEN UNDEROO AWARDS.

Now what is this....? are you claiming they're yellow? Are you calling me one of the philthy cheap bastards who held onto their money, thus worsening America's economic problems?

well the bad news is, I, like many other bloggers, am too poor to afford new underpants, much less gold ones.

But i did stay at a Holiday Inn Express last night!

ok, i didnt do that either, did you have to ruin the fun?


And now our award of the evening........ Homoerotic photo of the year.

And the Nominees Are......

Jonny Flynn

Scoop Jardine

A suprise entry..... Cam Dantley

Andy Rautins

Disqualified: Eric Devendorf because he couldnt be here tonight, he's busy washing dishes.
Kristof, only because hes slacking a bit and lost his starting job to jackson.
And the underoo goes to............
Cam Dantley of the SU football team!
and now the acceptance speech.
" I would like to thank his royal highness, Ray Biggs, for this great honor."
"in addition i also owe a great deal of thanks to a great group of people who really gave me the want to in order to fight the fight this year............. these people include:
The people in the audience here tonight, this may be the first time i've been the center of attention and more than half the seats have been filled, and the Notre Dame game doesnt count. They were only there to see "the" catholic institution of higher learning, do what they do worst, play football. And then me and my boy donte did it IN AND AROUND YOUR MOUTH Charlie Weis!
I would also like to thank my wonderful center Jim Mckenzie for allowing me the privlege of staring at and reaching under his wonderful ass. I'd tap that. Thank you and god bless america! except south bend, indiana, which is now a nuclear disaster area."
Well there you have it, one in the books, and i'll have another tomorrow.

Some belated christmas gifts

Ok, first of all.

The other night i fell asleep as opposed to posting, sorry.

Second of all,

sorry i havent posted the past couple of days. its christmas.

Third of all,

merry christmas/happy festivus.

I'll leave you some wonderful video goodies for now, post something else, and then ill post later tonight.


This man celebrates christmas the way it oughta be.

somebody went to georgetown.......

I could see nearly all of this applying to charlie weis.
I'm kinda glad we didnt hire mangino now. we would have had to answer to this.

and finally, we have a high riser coming in next fall.... brandon triche.
take a look.

Monday, December 22, 2008

I'll post

after the orange play coppin state tonight.
don't think i forgot about y'all.

Saturday, December 20, 2008


6pm Eastern.
Be here.

Friday, December 19, 2008

All hands on deck....

Well, apparently for the next couple of games it could be a very bumpy ride for the orange. Devendorf won't play, and flynn may see less minutes than we anticipated due to a knee injury sustained on wednesday night. So this leaves us with a few problems.

First of all,if flynn doesnt start, who's going to start?

Here's my best guess






Where are the Homoerotic Photographs we know and love going to come from now?

here are your candidates......

Andy Rautins, he looks like he's enjoying the view in this picture

Kristof! Who says europeans cant be sensitive towards their fellow man?

No one knows what happened next.........

He doesnt appear to be intent on letting go, despite this player's attempt to escape.

Kristof is big pimpin, at least in his own fantasy world.
Conclusion: Kristof loves embracing African-American Men.
No more nominees, Kristof wins by unanimous decision.
But the most important question is.....
Can we win this game?: I'm going to be optimistic about this and say YES we can win this game. If flynn plays over 23 minutes and memphis has more turnovers than we do, i think winning this ballgame is a definite possibility.
some other things that will decide the game
-Can someone please feed arinze the ball?
a little fun fact if you havent heard: Arinze hasnt missed more than 3 shots in a game this season, and last i checked his FG percentage was around 80, which is an unheard of number.
-Without Devo, Can the Orange take care of the basketball better?
I think so. I mean Devendorf is playing like he's Gerry Mcnamara. The team gets in a hole and he thinks he has to be the hero and "save the day". Unlike Gerry, Devo got mashed to a pulp every time he has tried this. He's an interior Donte Greene, he takes it to the rack no matter how horrible the shot selection may be.
-Can Kristof be the savior?
Yes he can, He's beginning to go into 07-08 late season Form Already, Especially after a nice effort vs. Long Beach State. If there's a double team on flynn, harris, or onuaku, and he stays out of foul trouble, The Waffle could have a field day against the Memphis defense.
How many Minutes will Mookie Jones See?
With devo out, i expect to see mookie get a few more minutes, i believe he'll play between 12 and 15 minutes of this ballgame just to keep fresh legs on the floor.
What will ultimately win or lose the game for the orange?
Its going to be a tight ballgame, so im just going to say the Presence, And/Or absence of a 60 foot desperation heave by memphis.
Prediction: Syracuse 78, Memphis 75
Come here for a livechat during the game tomorrow.
After wednesday's chatting fiasco, i hope to see many of you there.

Wednesday, December 17, 2008

We Lost Anonymous

Canisus postgame
And counseling for those still dealing with the mere fact that we lost to Cleveland State
9pm Eastern. Be here.

I could watch this over and over....

Monday, December 15, 2008

The View from Outer Mongolia part 1. the 12 steps to coping with losses.

Before i begin i'd just like to give you a little breakdown of why i do this.
For those of us not fortunate enough to be able to watch games on time warner because we dont live in "God's Kingdom" or for the rest of us, Syracuse, i figure i should give an opinion of the untelevised games from my own perspective based on statistics, articles, and of course the lovely postgame presser.

But thi s week, i give you the 12 step plan to syracuse loss recovery, totally (not) stolen from AA.

any questions?
and so it begins........

Well boys and girls,(especially those of you like me that feel like they live on uranus)(hehe i said uranus), we............. its a word that starts with L and totally ends with ost...... im lost in thought trying to think of this word.its the opposite of win. Can i phone a friend?

oh here it is......... lost.

and that brings us to step 1

1.Admitting we have a problem- Yes based on tonights game, we have a problem. Free throws? clang, Effort? no way jose., Discipline? These guys could have gotten away with murder.

2.Believing god can restore us to sanity- I don't know about this one. He doesnt seem very reliable, especially after not letting us have turner gill.

3.Making a decision to turn our will over to god- See number 2.

4.Taking a personal inventory- Uncontested shots? check. Poor execution? check. Lack of movement on offense? check. Bad passes? bingo. Poor Shot Selection? shizzam.

5.Admitting the exact nature of our wrongs- How can I put this nicely? we played like we were in the special olympics tonight.

6.Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character. - Jim Boeheim, take a moment from your god duties and teach these kids to shoot free throws.

7.Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings.- Boeheim, use your time travel powers and just erase the loss. use the "reset" button. After all it seems to be the basis for my generation anyway.

8.Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all.- Georgetown? never. St. Francis? well my sister goes there now, that'll do.

9.Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.- Lets punch some ACLs.

10.Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it.- Im sure there was plenty of this in the presser. And if there wasnt, hopefully we can save our frustrations now and have the rest of the basketball team slap random women.

11.Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His Will for us and the power to carry that out.

we.... need...... more..... power...........

12.Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs.

This says it best. the orange played like a bunch of alcoholics. and they need to wake up and play as a team or the big east is gonna kill our chances.

and with that, i leave you.

Friday, December 12, 2008

Doctor's Orders 12/12

Whenever Dr. Gross spews enough public verbal feces to make it worth my while, i provide you with in depth analysis and plenty of mockery. This is the 2nd part in a series of currently unknown length.

As you all know, a new coach means a nice long presser with the good doctor. without further Adieu, lets perform surgery.

"I can't find anything bad about this guy."

I dont have a doctorate and i found at least SOMETHING bad about the guy. Average Joes 1, Phds 0.

"Doug's very first interview was overwhelming. It was electric."

Doug's.......a....... Robot? Please tell me hes not programmed to obey your every command.

"You can't outwork Doug Marrone. I'm not even going to try."

No wonder you're on the hot seat. Did you "Not Try" when you hired greg?

"This guy came in the first meeting with three or four notebooks with detailed stuff all about Syracuse."

This tells me 2 things
1. This guy is prepared to do this job
2.He also has WAYYYYYYY too much time on his hands.

"We'll be there to support him, get him what he needs and hopefully we'll get him a big fan base to come out and check it out."

how Darryl can help this cause:
1.lower ticket prices
2. Mini-Kiss

"It's time for us to let Doug take off"

Be free Dougie........ Be FREE!

"We have a group of kids who are just so hungry to win and do the right thing."

And open a hookah bar......

And the winner is.......

Once again, sorry for my lack of updates, ive been rather busy this week.
I'll never do it again, i swear, just dont pull the belt out.......

Well ladies, gentlemen, and Rob Konrads of all ages,
We have ourselves a coach.
*drumroll please*
and the new SU Football Coach is..........., Doug Marrone.

Now personally this comes as a bit of a shock to me for a variety of reasons. Its not a bad hire at all, but looking at the better available candidates, it makes me wonder how it happened.

Reasons why he's a good choice
1. The number 1 thing id look for in a coach is that he is a teacher as opposed to a fat figurehead, executive type bastard. we definitely get that with Doug Marrone, who doesnt exactly come across as pete carroll or anything but still is a great teacher of the game.

2. He's been an offensive line coach previously. Definitely something syracuse needs to improve based on the past couple of years.

3.He's an alum. It's a guy that speaks the language of upstate new yorkers well. He also has ties in the NYC, which can definitely provide us with a few nice recruits.

4. He's coached at both the collegiate and pro levels. definitely helps a guy see both sides, although it didnt appear to help greggers too much.

5. He's got balls because hes putting his career in an interesting position by taking this job. hopefully his playcalling is just as ballsy.

6. He cant do any worse than greg did.

Reasons why it might not be good

1. He hasnt worked in the northeast in a while, and as we all know, people retire, move on, and die. so many of his connections may no longer exist.

2. Skip holtz was a better choice. plain and simple.

3. He was a pro coach. And if hes gonna coach at SU he needs to learn rule number 1 of college football: pro style offenses are worthless. Just ask Army.

4.Things might get a little shaky next year just with the recruiting situation. hopefully he has a staff in place before the first of the year so we can get the ball rolling in that department.

Well, there you have it, the arguements have been made.

Oh and apparently, mike williams isint coming back

A guy that isint even a player stole his number.... low blow.

Monday, December 8, 2008

Skip Holtz mad-Libs!

Well if you overdosed on ambien and missed the past couple of days, you'll be glad to know that Skip Holtz will meet with Darryl Gross tonight.

First off, i love the ticker on espn last night, it said
"ECU head coach Skip Holtz to meet with Syracuse AD Darryl Gross about coaching position, ESPN's Lou Holtz Reports."

Nice journalism Lou, who else to cover but the contreversy surrounding your own son. brilliant.
Need i remind him too that his son has a bowl win in the past 20 years.

And so without further Adieu, i give you a fine skip holtz mad lib, using an actual post-standard article. Y'all better respond now, ya hear?

The orange sweater is (a word indicating how often) the dead giveaway
by (your name)/The Post-Standard
Monday December 08, 2008, 11:41 AM

(place) -- The ice (noun) on my snow (noun) broke yesterday. And while I'm riding (noun) last night, my windshield wiper (verb) off. So where were we?

Time to take stock of the (plural noun) one more time.
East Carolina head coach Skip Holtz is (verb ending in -ing) to Syracuse University director of athletics (name of idiot) today in New York City.

(noun) continues to point in his direction as the guy closest to being named the next head (sport other than football) coach at Syracuse.

The other (plural noun) as best I can tell are Buffalo's Turner Gill, New Orleans Saints offensive (job) Doug Marrone and Temple head coach Al Golden.

I know Golden put out a (noun) about not (verb ending in -ing) the (noun), but that's a smokescreen. The guy wants the (noun). This is not to (verb) Temple, but that school is located in a (verb), (verb) neighborhood and is a difficult place to (verb) recruits. What Golden has done there is (adjective) and it's why he's a (adjective) candidate. It's likely Golden got wind he was not Syracuse's top candidate and did what all coaches do in these situations - say (derogatory word) publically to save (noun) and protect (noun). Same thing happened at Washington with Mike Leach and Pat Hill.

Golden is a tremendous (noun) and apparently had a terrific (noun) with Gross. If there's a concern, it's that he's a CEO type and defers to defensive and offensive coordinators.

Unlike the first search four years ago, Gross has been heavily (verb ending in -ing) anyone with a Syracuse pedigree. That's why he's spoken to Marrone, UConn head coach Randy Edsall, Minnesota Vikings assistant Kevin Rogers ((verb) by Donovan McNabb), University of Florida assistant Steve Addazio (backed by the Rob Konrad group) and New York Giants offensive coordinator Kevin Gilbride (backed by Tom Coughlin). He also interviewed Eagles assistant Mark Whipple on the recommendation of someone within the Big (noun) Conference.

Sometimes, I wonder if Gross in covering his political and logistical (plural noun) hasn't been looking at the possibility of building a staff around a central CEO figure like Marrone or Golden. Maybe he spoke to some of the other coaches in the process about (noun) positions.. It's why they're probably secondary candidates behind Holtz and Gill, who have head coaching experience. Maybe Daryl did get star-stuck a bit with Chip Kelly and the (adjective) offense at Oregon, but his critical criteria all along was to hire someone with head-coaching experience.

I know Daryl (verb) Illinois offensive coordinator Mike Locksley early in the process. If he wanted to (verb) Locksley, he would have (verb) him the job a long time ago. He's interviewed so many coaches since, Locksley got the message. He's apparently going to be hired as the head coach at New Mexico.

If you're trying to handicap this a little, try and put yourself in Daryl's (article of clothing) this morning. His job is absolutely on the line as he makes this selection. If the pick doesn't work out, he probably won't survive as (job). Do you trust your job with Marrone or Addazio, who don't have head coaching experience? Or do you trust it with guys like Holtz and Gill and the (plural noun) of their work at East Carolina and Buffalo?

If you subscribe to the position that it's Holtz and Gill as finalists, ask yourself if one (noun) is safer than the other? Is one bolder than the other? Who do you like? Are there other schools involved with Holtz and Gill that could upset the process and force Syracuse to move on Marrone, Golden or Addazio?

As we follow this along, you certainly get the sense we're at the end of the (noun) here and Gross will make his decision this week. It could move very (adjective) based on how things go today between Holtz and Gross.

Thanx for all the emails and notes from readers. I do appreciate them. I've also gone to share that I got today from a blog reader here in Syracuse. She reports her mom (verb) in Greenville and (verb) the Holtz family. Scuttlebutt there is that (supermodel), Skip's wife, recently purchased an orange (article of clothing). Leave it to the fashion gumshoes to break this story. The orange (article of clothing) is a dead giveaway every time.

Saturday, December 6, 2008


Slow news day today........ here's some links.

Friday, December 5, 2008

LolOrange 12/5

The Two underoos

Every week me and Alex over at the other SWRLU ask each other questions of the utmost importance about syracuse athletics.

This week, i sound off on fine topics such as the nonexistent Mars recruiting hotbed.

Sum up the G-Rob era in one word.

for multiple reasons
1.Greg was full of it
2. Darryl still is full of it
3.i said it more than any other word during a game

Favorite Gregism of all time?
"maybe it'll snowball into something that can catch fire"
it's a classic.
Funny story, i'm using that as my senior quote for my school's yearbook.
But orange county ironically, isint really that big on syracuse, so people are going to go who the fuck is greg robinson?
in 2005, i asked that very same question and i dont think anyone else wants to know the answer.

When are we going to learn who the new football coach is?
Next week. Steve Addazio please.

The Fro: yea or nay?
Yea. It's like the Giambi Moustache, dont change it until you lose.

Will we go undefeated in non-conference games?
Odds are, yes. Personally, i think we can beat memphis if we play at least a decent game.(Eric Devendorf, pay attention) and people pass the rock rather than take a dumbass shot.

Is this year's Big East the best basketball conference in the history of the universe?
This year's Big east is the best basketball conference in outer space, period.
Mars certainly isint a recruiting hotbed.

Would you rather insult Coach Q's mother to his face or box Arinze Onuaku?
Insult Coach Q's mother to his face. If you may recall, Arinze eats small children for breakfast.

It's going to be a slow week in SU athletics... how will you pass the time with nothing but a game against Cornell? Eh, probably sit in the corner and cry in the fetal position like we just lost to Georgetown. I'll think of something.

Wednesday, December 3, 2008

LOLorange 12/3

Sorry for the lack of updates folks, here's a little piece for you and ill have the two underoos and something new for you tomorrow.