Thursday, May 7, 2009

the SOBs-Most Suprising Player

(Takes Microphone from Brian)
(Bump bump bump)
Is this thing on?

Hello and welcome to another edition of the SOBs. I have the sweet, glorious honor of presenting Day 2's first award, Most Suprising Player.

Today's recipient was really a shot in the dark coming into this season. He didn't provide enough frequent minutes the year before, and with Donte gone the new question was? How would we fill that void?

We found an absolutely superb answer in none other than today's recipient........................................

Drum roll................................

And the SOB goes to........................

"Slick" Rick "Action" Jackson!

(sporadic applause)
(Doc Gibbs and the emeril live band begin playing)

Rick jackson really did everything we asked, and then some for the orange this season. As much as we love ongenaet and seeing him start, he simply lacked the presence on the offensive end that Rick had. Just look at the numbers.

Kristof Averaged 3.1 Points Per Game this season.

Rick had more than double that at 8.2.

And let's be honest, he looked feeble in his freshman season, and he improved in almost all key facets of his game which really helped when arinze was struggling. A good basketball team always has a bruising forward, and when Arinze couldn't do it, Rick was there to pick us up.

And now, his acceptance speech.

"I would like to thank the Academy for this imaginary honor. It brings tears to my eyes when i know i beat out a white guy who is barely 6 feet tall for this award. I would also like to thank my mom, Eric Devendorf for all the wonderful kodak moments we have shared, Ray for being absolutely god, Kristof! for sucking earlier in the year, and the man who invented farting for making me an internet sensation, thank you."

Very well put, i cried too.

and with that, i turn this party bus over to the folks over at Orange Fizz for the presentation of a hotly contested award, Best Junior!
(Crowd goes OOOOOOOOhhhh! AHHHHHH!")

The floor is now yours.

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